Parents and caregivers of infants and toddlers often describe moments when they are watching, waiting, wondering, and worrying about their young children. They wonder whether their fussy baby is getting enough sleep or worry about whether their picky toddler is eating enough fruit and vegetables. They may find it hard to wait for a child to begin to crawl or talk and wonder about when their child may reach this milestone.

The love that parents and caregivers of young children feel for their rapidly changing infants and toddlers may be part of the reason this worrying and wondering begins. Parents and caregivers want to give infants and toddlers the best start they can. It is normal to worry whether they have enough resources or knowledge to help their child reach their fullest potential. They may wonder whether having more books, more toys, or signing their child up for more classes is what their child needs to grow and thrive. They may spend time worrying and wondering whether they are giving their child enough. This worry can lead to discouragement and feelings of inadequacy as a parent or caregiver. They may wonder: “Am I what my child needs?”

Each child in early intervention develops on a unique timeline. Early intervention families may find themselves worrying or wondering about whether their child is doing okay as they watch their child and wait for their child to reach particular milestones or skills. It can be difficult to avoid comparing your child’s progress to those of infants and toddlers who do not have a developmental delay or disability. This comparison can cause even more worry, which can be overwhelming.

In these moments, it is important to remember that you are what your child needs. He needs a loving caregiver who wants to help him grow. Every time you interact with your child by talking, playing, and doing daily tasks, you are building your child’s brain and helping his body become stronger and more skillful. You also are not alone. Reach out to your EI team, family, and friends for support and help.

Remember as a parent or primary caregiver, you have the most interactions and opportunities to watch your child discover her world. Share your observations and the things you wonder about with your EI team.

Sometimes you will need to wait to connect with an EI team member until the next EI session. While you wait, you can write down, video, or photograph the behaviors or skills you are wondering about.

Reaching out to your EI team can help you set aside worries about whether you are giving your child all that he needs. Remember, you are what your child needs! Involved, caring parents and caregivers working with their EI team to achieve outcomes give children a strong start.

Originally written for the Illinois Early Intervention Clearinghouse Newsletter: https://eiclearinghouse.org/newsletter/2018spring/

Babies and toddlers tune into messages from their caregivers. They are aware of their caregivers’ emotions and listen to their words. Because very young children are deeply connected with and tuned into their caregivers, it is vital that parents and caregivers be mindful about sharing messages that are a source of encouragement and positive energy.

Turning “don’t climb on the coffee table!” into “let’s go find a safe place in the back yard for you to climb” or turning “stop screaming!” into “I hear you’re angry when I tell you there’s no more cereal” can help caregivers feel calmer. Young children also follow positive directions more readily than negative discouragements.

Positive talk is not only beneficial for babies and toddlers. Positive talk and positive thinking also are important for parents and caregivers of children receiving early intervention services. Negativity can rear its ugly head when we are feeling discouraged or feeling impatient. Families in early intervention may be coping with their child’s complex medical or educational needs. Their development may not follow the typical progression of peers their age. This can lead to a negative cycle of thinking that gets in the way of noticing the important progress an infant or toddler is making in early intervention.

We can mindfully acknowledge these negative thoughts and reframe them with positive thinking, which can help us keep a positive attitude as we work toward EI outcomes. Reframing doesn’t make our sadness or frustration go away, but it can help us be more resilient and optimistic about the challenges we face with our child.

Here are a few examples of reframing negative thoughts into more positive ones.

When you think “my child can’t hear my voice due to hearing loss,” reframe it by thinking, “I know I am connecting with my child when we look into each other’s eyes.”

“My toddler cries and falls apart because he can’t use words to tell me what he wants” can become “we’re working on learning important words in sign language to help him communicate.”

“My friends are celebrating their babies’ first steps, but my child can’t walk” can become “Let’s enjoy my child’s new crawling skills by trying to climb on a pile of pillows to help build her muscles.”

Originally written for the Illinois Early Intervention Clearinghouse Newsletter: https://eiclearinghouse.org/newsletter/2018spring/

The Illinois Early Intervention Clearinghouse has a new tip sheet called, “Set Me Up for Success!”. It is located here: https://eiclearinghouse.org/einotes/setup-success/.

Set Me Up for Success!

Families reach EI outcomes by making the most of everyday moments. In early intervention (EI), we focus on how children learn during everyday routines. Caregivers can help children successfully participate by encouraging infants and toddlers to be active participants throughout the day. As a caregiver, you can:

Take Turns With Your Child

• You do, I do! Wet a washcloth and let your child take a turn wiping his own face.
• Wait for a response and help your child learn the routine. For example, say “so big” and wait for your child to hold her arms up over her head or help her hold her arms up.
• Take turns stacking blocks or throwing bean bags or rolled-up socks into a basket.

Match and Follow Your Child

• Notice where your child is looking or turn your head toward the sound your child is reacting to.
• Respond to your child’s feelings by naming emotions such as sad, happy, and mad.
• Copy your child’s action or sound. Wave your hand back at her wave or clap along with your child.

Challenge Your Child

• Give your child safe and interesting objects and toys to explore. She may enjoy banging on pots or looking through a transparent cup.
• Add to routines. Sing a new toothbrushing song, let your child fill and empty a laundry basket while you fold clothes, or play peekaboo with a towel during bathtime.
• Present “dilemmas” for the child to solve, such as hiding a toy in a box and encouraging your child to find it or putting a favorite toy further away to encourage her to pull up and reach for it.

Get in Place to Connect

• Position a nonmobile child so he can hear and see well.
• Physically support your child to allow interaction by using pillows or your hands.
• Use all of your spaces, such as a blanket on the floor, a grassy patch, or playground as places for interactions.

The staff of the Illinois Early Intervention Clearinghouse has started to work on a new series of Tip Sheets called, “Everyday Early Intervention.” The first in the series is called “Couch Time.” We hope that families find these to be practical and useful suggestions for integrating EI Outcomes into everyday routines. Find the tip sheet here: https://eiclearinghouse.org/einotes/couchtime/.

Everyday Early Intervention: Couch Time

Many families enjoy spending time relaxing on the couch together. The couch can be a great place to sit together to talk, read, and play.  Moments on the couch can also be times to work on early intervention outcomes. Here are some ideas to help you fit learning and development goals into everyday routines.

Climb a Couch Cushion Mountain

Stack two or three couch cushions or pillows and encourage your child to use his arms and legs to climb up the mountain. Reaching and climbing strengthens large muscles. As your child grows stronger, add another cushion to the stack for a bigger climb or encourage your toddler to build the stack.

Cruise and Play

Encourage the large muscle development of infants and toddlers that are not quite walking by encouraging them to cruise the lengths of the couch. Take the cushions off your couch and place favorite toys toward the back. This will encourage a child to pull herself up to stand and reach toward the back of the couch to get to the toys.

Build a Blanket Fort

Stretch a blanket or sheet between your couch cushions and chairs to create a blanket fort. Crawl in and out of the fort to work on large muscle development. Talk together about who is inside or outside the fort and how the blanket makes a little house. Using words such as on, in, out, and under builds children’s spatial vocabulary and conceptual knowledge.

Snuggle Up and Read

Keep a basket of books near the couch so you always have something for story time. Reading to young children is essential for building their language skills and conceptual knowledge. Read favorite books again and again. Encourage your child to point to the pictures as you read by asking questions such as “Where is the brown doggy?”